Me: Excuse me
SG (seagull): [sits silently]
Me: Ahem… excuse me please.
SG: [fluffs feathers, glares at me]
Me: [glares back] I want to shoot the bridge.
SG: Yeah, so?
Me: It’s an icon of this city.
MSG (monsieur [huffy] SG): You and every tourist. What makes you so special?
Me: You have an attitude. I want a picture of it. Do you mind?
SASG (figure it out): It’s a chunk of steel, just sits there.
Me: [losing patience] It’s a beautiful bridge!
SG: You should photograph something interesting. Look, I can stand on one leg. [stands on one leg]
Me: Go find a different rail.
SG: Go find a different bridge. I was here first.
Me: I will not! I’m here to shoot the Golden Gate.
SG: Find a different place to shoot it. I like this spot and I won’t move! [mutters under breath: tourists!]
Me: I’m not a tourist!
SG: Oh yeah? Then why are you carrying a camera?
Me: I’m a photographer.
SG: Take that Miss Photographer! [turns around]
Me: [dances happily, singing] I just shot you in the arse. Take that, smartypants!
SG: You didn’t!!
Me: Oh. Yes. I. Did!!
As an aside, I named this image “Lamp Post” because I’ve been told I’ll argue with a lamp post or just about anything.